I called my brother for the Amazon pin. We share an account. I wanted to buy Monsters Inc. for the kids to watch.
"You're doing this all wrong. You need to use Vudu."
"The doughnuts? Oh...you mean the witching tradition. That seems a little archaic and barbaric."
"No the app. Then we can share movies. How old is your TV?"
"Like in dog years?"
"No tech years?"
"Well, it was before Evelyn was born. Ordering it was the last thing I did before I got the flu in Utah that made me miss your wedding. So around that old."
"Your digital life needs a therapist."
You see folks, I starred into the abyss that would be my summer and had some anxiety about the time my offspring would spend in front of screens, or fighting about screens, or whining because they want a screen. It weighed on my mind so heavily that I took it to the "Big Man" AKA God, in prayer. Fact: The following is the answer to that prayer.
We lost the remote to the TV the first of May. We only have bunny ears that work on days below 70 degrees, hence limited local stations. We have a blu-ray player with WIFI but it is missing the left arrow button which means we could only enjoy Bella's account, ( fun fact: once you hit the far right options is doesn't start over). This also makes searching for movies super interesting and occasionally inappropriate. Oh! and the Ipad password stopped working around Memorial Day for good measure. Winning.
Thank you Lord.
Now don't get me wrong. They find plenty of other things to whine about. I'm borderline impressed by the drama that can be rallied around a simple "Not right now" from me. Borderline impressed, mostly annoyed.
But the screens haven't been a huge deal this summer. They had to dig through the 103 DVD's we somehow still own to find something to their liking. Then they have to agree. Or scream. Usually both. They've had to throw a ball, build with legos, jump on the tramp, play a game.
My point is y'all, my life in the digital realm is beyond pathetic. Like really tragic. My phone is 3 years old. My TV (we only have one) is 7 years old. My Ipad is dysfunctional and I didn't have a functioning computer until last week. I'll own my technology drought. You should also know that I am digitally inept. Truly. A 93 year old woman with WIFI...that's me. (sigh) I've got so much to learn.
But there are bright sides to Sahara-like-Tech-life.
1.It lines up nicely with the rest of my quirky existence.
1.One less battle to fight in parenthood.
1. They've had to figure it out.
I do not have the pin number or a functioning remote yet (apparently you can order them on Amazon...Harry is baffled that I didn't know this 3 months ago. HeHe) My brother is threatening to fly up here and iron out my digital existence. Which I am not opposed to. The last time he was here, he installed my exterior lights! Bring it on Marky!
The point is, America, God answers prayers and there is a bright side. Always.
Now...if there is such a thing as a tech therapist. Send them my way. Otherwise, Mark is en route.